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A LION AMONG UDIES 



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"Salter iTdhker &cq. 

B03T0N ^. 



A NEW PLAY FOR FEMALE CHARACTERS. 

A Compamoti to "REBECCA'S TRIUMPH." 

ANITA'S TRIAL; 

Or, Our Girls in Camp. 

By Esther B. Tiffany, author of "A Rice Pudding," "That Patrick," 
" Young Mr. Pritchard," etc. 

Price, ----.__ 35 cents. 

This is a bright and sparkling comedy in three acts, for eleven 
female characters. Its story is entertaining, and its dialogue dis- 
tinguished by this author's delicate humorous touch. One scene only 
is necessary for the three acts — a camp in tl)e woods, easily arranged. 
The dresses are simple and picturesque camping costumes. ' The enor- 
mous success of " Rebecca's Triumph " has created a demand for this 
sort of piece, to meet which we confidently present "Anita's Trial," 
in which is solved, with no less success than in its predecessor, the 
difficult problem of constructing a play of strong human interest with- 
out the assistance of male characters. 



The n HRONOTHANATQLETRQN: 

OR, OLD TIMES MADE NEW. 

An entertainment in one act for sixteen girls, written for the Class Day 
Exercises at Dana Hall School, Wellesley, Mass., by two members 
of the Class of '87 and first performed before members of the school 
and their friends, June 18, 1887, and later at Ellsworth, Maine, 
April 6, 1888. 

Price, --_->_- 35 cents. 



THE PEAK SISTERS. 

A humorous entertainment for young ladies. Arranged by Mary B. 
HoRNE. Any number of ladies may take part, but seven only are 
necessary. No scenery; costumes very simple. This laughable 
trifle meets with invariable success wherever performed. 

Price, ---___- 15 cents. 



THE BOOK OF DRILLS. 

A group of entertainments for female characters for s+age or floor per- 
formance, by Mary B. Horne, the author of " The Peak Sisters," etc. 

Price, ---_-_. 30 cents. 



WALTER E BAKER & CO,, PnUlisliers, 23 Winter St, Boston. 



A 



LION AMONG LADIES 



^ Cirxrmjeilaj XXX ^miy ^cts 



BY 

WILLIAM F. MACY 



X^VOFCOA/g:;, 
^^ COPYRIGHT- '"■ 

%o ul T ^ 



BOSTON 



^^^zAir-'A^.^<:^b.,^^^^ 



j^ 

1890 



T^^ 



CHARACTERS. 



Squire Morton 
Jack Morton . 
Ned Winslow 
Johnnie . 
Belle Morton 
Marion Kimball 
Miss Sarah Morton 



% 



3^ 
^7. 



iJK 



A country gentleman, old school 
His son, a Harvard setitor 
Of Boston, jfack's chum 
A boy 
Jack^s sister 
. Belle'' s friefid 
The squire's maiden sister 



Martha Maid of all -work 



LIST OF PROPERTIES. 
First Act. Second Act. 



Fancy Work. 
Book. 
Telegram. 
Carpet Sweeper. 
Bundles. 



Newspaper. 

Cigars. 

Trunk. 

Matches. 

Book. 



COSTUMES.— Modern and appropriate. 

SCENE. — Room in Squire Morton's House, Greenfield. 

Time, present day. 

Time in presentation, one hour. 




Copyright, 1890, 
By WALTER H. BAKER & CO, 



^ -3^9 




A LION AMONG LADIES. 



ACT I. 

Scene. — Sitting-room in Squire Morton's house. Well 
furnished i7i the style of an old couutfy mansion. Piatio 
or bookcase, chairs, table with lam.p, etc. Room i7t some 
confusion, books, papers, ladies' fa>icy work, etc., lying 
about. Fire i?i grate or fireplace. Large easy-chair on 
casters u. L. c, before hearth-rug. Room may be decorated 
with Christinas evergreen if desired. 

(Belle <^;^(^Marion discovered at rise of curtain. Belle 
at 7'ight of table busy with Christmas fancy work. Mar- 
ion reading in large chair before fire. As curtai^t rises she 
throws down book, yawns, and pidls chair round, facing 
audience?) 

Marion. Oh, dear ! I do wish Mr. Howells would put a 
little more life into his heroes. His men are such perfect 
sticks ; and yet one can't help being fascinated with them 
merely as abstract studies of character, they are ?,q> perfectly 
true to life. Bother the men, anyway, I say. 

Belle {quietly'). Yes, dear. They say that you do. 

Marion. Do what ? 

Belle. Bother the men. 

Marion. Belle Morton, what do you mean? 

Belle. Oh, nothing. 

Marion. Who ever said that of me? 

Belle. Why, all the fellows in Wellesley have been 
bothered more or less ever since the day you arrived — a year 
ago last September — not to mention the hosts of " deah 
boys '' who came all the wiy from Boston every Saturday 
afternoon on purpose to see you off on the three o'clock 
train to Hartford. Why, every one knows how they used to. 



4 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

draw lots to see which one should ride as far as Springfield 
with you, and then the lucky one had to wait four hours in 
Springfield for the Albany Express back to Boston, arriving 
shortly before midnight. If that isn't bother enough, I should 
like to know what is ! 

Marion. Belle Morton, do you believe in a future state ? 

Belle. Nothing beyond the state of matrimony. But 
{laughing^, confess now, Marion, that masculine society is 
absolutely indispensable to your existence. 

Marion. Til not confess anything of the kind. Haven't 
I been here nearly a week and been perfectly contented 1 

Belle, To the first, yes — a week to-morrow. To the 
second — no! most decidedly. Haven't you wandered aim- 
lessly about the house ever since this horrid storm set in 7 
Haven't you sighed and yawned, and yawned and sighed, 
alternately, for the past three days, your face wearing all the 
time a sort of a "' what's-this-dull-town-to-me " expression ? 
Don't deny it, I am not so blind as not to see that. But for- 
tunately you won't have to wait but two days longer. 

Marion" {carelessly). Oh, is it Monday the boys are com- 
ing .? 

Belle. Just as if you didn't know and hadn't been count- 
ing the hours for three days past ! But it was aggravating, 
wasn't it, that they could not come through to-night. That's 
the worst of Hving in such a dull, poky town. The idea of 
not having any train from Saturday morning till Monday 
morning ! And Jack never will cut recitations if the heavens 
fall. He must stay till the last gun is fired Saturday after- 
noon, and then have to wait a day and a half in Cambridge 
before starting for Greenfield. Oh, it's too mean ! Just 
think of all day to-morrow ! 

Marion. Well, I guess the boys will be quite contented in 
Boston. But it would be a little pleasanter for us if they 
were to be here to-morrow. 

Belle. Oh, you really think so, then 1 But you do the 
boys an injustice. I'm sure Jack is anxious to be home over 
Sunday, especially as I've written him that you are here. 
But don't please bring him to terms too quickly, Marion. 
He's awfully susceptible. 

Marion. Well, isn't that rather a doubtful compliment ? 
But you needn't fear. I'm awfully out of practice. I think 
I shall retire to a convent in the spring. I'm weary of the 
frivoHties of this world. 



A LION AMONG LADIES. 5 

Belle. O Marion, what a perfectly fascinating little sis- 
ter of mercy you would make ! Just imagine ! {Enthusiasti- 
cally^. With a robe and hood of crepe noire, just a suspi- 
cion of v/hite within the hood and at the throat and wrists. 
Why, you'd be perfectly irresistible ! 

Marion. O Belle, don't gush ! {Rises and crosses to 
table.) But about the other fellow that Jack is going to 
bring with him — what sort is he ? 

Belle {crestfallen for a moment^ but recovering qtiickly). 
Oh, Mr. Winslow ? Well, really, I know no more than you 
do about him. Only Jack writes that he's a great swell — a 
regular Boston blue-blood, you know — one of the Mayflower 
Winslows. The family have lived on Beacon Street for four 
generations. The original Winslow — not the Mayflower 
one, but the first wealthy member of the family — made his 
money in the West India trade, whatever that maybe. 

Marion. Oh, yes; molasses, and spices, and rum • 
Principally the latter, I should say, from what I have heard 
of the old Boston merchants. 

Belle. Why, Marion, how uncharitable ! But then, 
even if it is true, you must remember that such a business 
was perfectly proper and legitimate in those days, when 
every one used liquors. In fact it's all right now, if the busi- 
ness is wholesale. 

Marion {sarcastically). Oh, really. 

Belle {warmly). Yes, really! But I know you don't 
think so, so we won't discuss the matter. We can make our 
plans for Christmas to-morrow, and fix up a few surprises for 
the boys. We'll manage to pass the time somehow, though 
I do wish they could have come through to-night. 

{Door-bell rings. ^EiuhK goes ont and returns i?t a inoynent 
followed by Johnnie, who is covered with snow., blowing 
his fingers and stamping his feet.) 

Belle {o7itside). Come in, Johnnie, and get warm. {En- 
ters follotued by Johnnie.) What a terrible storm ! Any 
news down town, Johnnie ? 

Johnnie {slowly pulling off 7/iittens, unbuttoning his 
coat, and warnnng himself at fire). No, Miss Belle ; I 
don't hear nothin' particular. The mill's shet down till after 
Christmas, an' the minister's wife's sick, an' Mr. Smitli's gone 
to Pittsfield on a lawsuit, an' the Boston drummer's here, an' 



6 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

Dr. Perkins's horse's kicked the bucket, an' — I guess that's 
all. (^Breathless. ~) 

Marion ( i!^^'^^ have been listening 7'aptly). Oh ! 

Johnnie {slowly going throrigh his pockets'). I got a tele- 
graph for you somewheres, Miss Belle. Find it'n a minute. 
It come this mornin', but Joe Carter, the telegraph operator, 
he was off up river, gunnin', an' his wife, she took the mes- 
sage off the ticker, but she didn't like to send it up till Joe 
come back and read it, an' he didn't get back till most dark, 
so I jest come up with it. Hope 'taint nothin' important. 
Now where'n thunder'd I put that? (^All this ti7ne goiiig 
through pockets. At last takes off hat for first time a?id 
finds 7nessage inside^ Oh, here it is. {Hands message to 
Belle, who has been zuaiting impatiently and helping him 
go through his pockets. ~) 

Belle. A telegram ! Why. it must be from Jack ! What 
can have happened.'' {Opejts hurriedly and reads.') "To 
Henry Morton, Esq., Greenfield, Mass. Special train on for 
the hohday travel. Leave Boston at two o'clock. Arrive in 
Greenfield at 7.30. (Signed) Jack." {Looks at watch.) 
Why it's quarter past seven now! They'll be here in fifteen 
minutes ! And father and aunt both over at the church dec- 
orating. Oh dear, Marion, what j-//^?// we do? {Distracted.') 

Marion {perfectly cool., to fohnnie, who has been preparing 
to go). Young man, skip as fast as your legs can carry you 
over to the Unitarian Church and tell Squire Morton and his 
sister to come home quick — Jack is coming at half-past seven ! 
Do you hear ? 

Johnnie. Yes, marm. {Aside, going.) Jerusalem crick- 
ets, ain't she a jim-dandy ! {Exit.) 

Marion. Now, Belle, what do you want done ? Of course 
they'll be starved. You run down and get something ready 
for the inner man, and I'll slick up here a little.* Hurry now ! 

Belle. O Marion, you are an angel ! You always know 
just what to do. {Exit.) 

Marion {hastily picki^tg up papers, etc., and putting room 
to rights). Well, it's fortunate somebody knows just what to 
do where she is. Won't her poor husband have to wait on 
her? Well, there's no man living good enough for her! 
That is, since she can't marry her own brother. He's good 
enous»h for any woman on earth. I wasn't altogether joking 
whei< { spoke about retiring to a convent. I shall certainly 



A LION AMONG LADIES. / 

do something desperate if Jack doesn't declare himself some- 
time within the next week. Susceptible, is he? Oh, yes, 
very ; but awfully slow about coming to the point. {Ring.) 
Now, who can that be ? {Goes toward door, then stops and 
thinks a moment.) Suppose it should be the boys. It must 
be about time for them. 

{Enter Martha.) 

Martha. O Miss Marion, a great tall gent, with a fur 
coat on, as wants to see Squire Morton. I told him Squire 
Morton was out, and then he wanted to see Miss Morton, 
an' when he found she was out, he wanted to. see Miss Belle 
Morton, an' he's wailin' out in the hall. 

Marion {aside). Who can it be.? Show the gentleman 
in, Martha, and go tell Miss Belle. 

Martha. Yes, ma'am. {Exit.) 

Marion {down l. c). A strange gentleman ! It can't 
be that anything has happened to Jack. {Enter Ned,/^/- 
lowed by Martha. He is clad in heavy ulster, sealskin cap 
and gloves.) 

Ned. a thousand pardons ! Miss Morton, of course. I 
shall be under the painful necessity of introducing myself. I 
am Mr. Winslow, your brother's chum. Jack is delayed, un- 
fortunately. {Commences to remove gloves^ 

Marion. Oh, yes ! You are indeed welcome, Mr. Wins- 
low. {Gives hand; aside, crossing to R.) So that's a Bos- 
ton blue-blood. Save the mark ! 

Ned. By Jove! she's a. stunner, but she doesn't look a 
bit like Jack. {Crosses to l.) 

Marion. Take Mr. Winslow's coat and hat, Martha. 
Ah, do be seated, Mr. Winslow. {Aside.) Suppose I don't 
tell him who I am for a few minutes. It will be a great lark, 
and I am just dying for excitement of some kind. {Aloud.) 
Jack is delayed, you say ? How, pray ? 

Ned {taking easy-chair). Yes ; it was too bad, poor fel- 
low, though I could not help laughing. You see we played 
whist all the way out with two Boston drummers. They got 
off at Miller's Falls, two stations below, you know; and, as 
we were out of cigars, Jack stopped off to get some at the 
news stand in the station. Well, he got off on the left-hand 
side and had to cross the track. And what do you think, 
just as he, came out the door, contrary to all the established 



8 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

laws of railroads all over the world, a freight train of about 
a hundred cars, more or less, came puffing into the station. 

Marion {alarvied). Oh, he wasn't hurt? 

Ned. Oh, no. Set your mind at rest on that point ; but 
while he stood there waiting for the freight to pass through, 
our train started up, and the last I saw of poor Jack he was 
running up the platform, waving his hands, and gesticulating 
wildly to the conductor of our train to stop. I could just see 
his head over the dump cars. Poor fellow, I pitied him ; but 
it was funny, ha, ha, ha! 

Marion. And Miller's Falls is ten miles from here, and 
no train till Monday. But of course he will find some one to 
drive him over. {Aside?) I'll never forgive him if he 
doesn't. 

Ned. Oh, yes, he'll be here to-night sure, if he moves 
heaven and earth to do it. He's been wild for the last three 
days, since you wrote that your friend Miss Kimball was to 
be here. Why, he was so impatient and distracted coming 
up that he trumped my ace no less than four times, and he 
made 2^ point oi returning his opponents' lead. Those drum- 
mers must have thought he was boozy ! 

Marion. Was what.'' 

Ned. Boozy — intoxicated, you know. But of course he 
wasn't. Jack's a perfect model. He never drinks — {aside) 
behind the bar. 

Marion. I'm very glad to hear it. I don't approve of 
young men drinking. {Aside.) He's a sensible fellow — he 
likes Jack. 

Ned. But I say, Miss Morton, I'm awfully anxious to 
see this Miss Kimball who has made such an impression on 
your brother. She must be a stunner, for the Cambridge girls 
consider him a perfect Gibraltar. 

Marion {aside). What fun! {Aloud.) Oh, she is, I 
assure you, a perfect stunner, as you call it, and as good as 
she is beautiful ! {Aside.) What will he think of me when 
he finds it out ? 

Ned. I know it. Why, it was a standing joke among the 
fellows the way he was attached to his sister at Wellesley. 
Used to go up there and see you pretty often last fall, didn't 
he ? ha, ha ! Every fellow in our set has wondered what she 
looked like for the past year. 

Marion. Oh, have they.? (Aside.) Delightful news for 
a modest retiring young woman — " that's me." 



/ 



A LION AMONG LADIES. 9 

Ned. Yes, and from all we can learn she seems, as the 
fellows say, to be leading him a devil of a dance ! 

Marion {rising indignantly). Sir! 

Ned. Oh, I beg pardon — a common expression, you 
know. Ouotatibn marl<s always excuse profanity. {Aside.) 
She's a regular little Puritan, though she doesn't look it. 

Marion {aside). " I must dissemble ! " as they say on the 
stage. {Aloud.) Oh, I didn't mind the expression so much, 
but remember, you are speaking of my brother and my dear- 
est friend. 

Ned. a thousand pardons, of course, if I have offended 
you. I meant no harm. But between you and me and the 
andirons, isn't it about so ? Isn't she .'' 

Marion. What } 

Ned. Wh}', leading him a dance. 

Marion. Oh ! go the whole length of the expression. 
Yes, undoubtedly, a — of a dance [with an expressive pause 
and gesture). 

Ned {aside). Jove, but she's a cute one, a star of the first 
magnitude, but — not exactly my style. {Alond.) Fm glad 
you agree with me. We all thought so at college. But I 
tell you, my principal motive in accepting Jack's invitation 
to spend the holidays with him was to make the acquaint- 
ance of his fair charmer. 

Marion. Oh, indeed! Suppose I should tell her that? 

Ned. Oh, but you wouldn't. However, I don't know as 
I should care. She must be rather heartless, to say the 
least, to keep Jack walking on eggshells the way she has the 
past six months. 

Marion. You think so ? 

Ne:d. I know it. Still, I shall of course make myself 
agreeable to her, and consider if it be worth my while to cut 
Jack out. 

Marion {aside). The conceit of the man! {Aloud.) 
Oh, you wouldn't be so hard on poor Jack, if he cares so 
much for her as you think. 

Ned. Wouldn't I, though ? You don't know me. And I 
have no doubt she will be agreeable. From all I hear she 
must be an incorrigible flirt. 

Marion. Oh, yes, she is! {Aside.) Isn't he getting, 
himself into an awful pickle ? But where can Belle be all 
this time? {Aloud.) But I'll go and call her, Mr. Wins- 
low, and present her ; then you can judge for yourself. 



lO A LION AMONG LADIES. 

Perhaps you would like to go to your room, though. It's 
directly opposite the head of the stairs here. {Opens door 
R.) The lamps are all lit. 

{Exit Ned.) 

Marion {falling into large chair and laughing immod- 
erately). Oh, oh, oh ! Isn't this rich ? And won't he be 
mad when he knows what he's done ^. Oh, oh ! Mr. Wins- 
low ! {Bursting out into fresh peals of latighter. Loud 
knock outside c.) Come in. {Enter Johnnie.) 

Johnnie. Please, miss, the squire, he's done gone down 
street in the sleigh to buy Christmas presents, an' his sister 
with him. {Aside R.) Jerusalem, look at them eyes ! 

Marion. Oh dear, what shall we do now? {Thinks a 
mo7nent. Snddenly.) Why not 1 The squire and his sis- 
ter won't be home for an hour yet, and of course Jack won't 
be here before ten o'clock at the earliest. Wouldn't it be a 
racket.-* If Belle will only consent. {Rushes out left, ]oii'i^- 
NIE staring after her.) 

Johnnie. Well, I guess she's "got 'em." {Crosses to 
easy-chair.) Now I wonder where Mai thy is. I hain't 
seen her for three days. In fact, I don't see her more'n 
once a week anyhow since she come to work at the squire's. 
{Enter Martha l., back to azidience, pulling carpet-sweeper 
in after her. Sings and runs caipet-sweeper rapidly about 
the room, not seeing Johnnie, who conceals himself behind 
easy -chair and keeps it between himself and Martha ufitil 
discovered. Martha, singing as she sweeps, gradually 
works rou7id toward fireplace, finally ptishing sweeper 
behind chair. Johnnie stands up sheepishly^ 

Martha. Well, I've swep' all kinds of stuff oif these 
floors since these ere gals came, but I hain't struck no sich 
rubbish as this till now. 

Johnnie. Now, Marthy, you don't mean that. You 
know you don't. 

Martha. Don't I ? Who told you ? You know too 
much ! 

Johnnie. Now, Marthy, don't be too hard on your best 
feller. You know you love me. {Starts forward with the 
intention of embracing her, wheft she deftly pushes sweeper 
in front of him, nearly throwing him headlong.) 

Martha. Do I .? Wh^r^'d you get so much information 
^11 of a sudden ? 



A LION AMONG LADIES. II 

Johnnie. Now, Marthy, I call that darned mean. What 
have I done ? 

Martha. What haven't you done, you better say. 
Didn't I see you a-walking up from the post-office with Sue 
Barker last night when I went down after the squire's mail ? 

Johnnie. The squire's mail.? Oh, yes, I was the male 
you was down street after, an' you know it. 

Martha {sarcastically). Oh, ain't you sharp ? You bet- 
ter look out this slippery weather. If you should fall down, 
you'd cut yourself bad ! 

Johnnie. Well, I wouldn't crack the paving-stone ; that's 
one consolation. You'd break the glass in every house 
within a mile if you should fall down, you great fatty. 

Martha {indignantly). Fatty, indeed ! You jist get out 
o' here quick, an' don't let me see your face in this house 
again. You great, long-legged, over-grown calf, you ! 

^ Johnnie {going). Well, I wouldn't be your shape for all 
o' Squire Morton's money, so there! I hope you'll live and 
die an old maid, so there ! {At door c.) And I'm going 
right over to Sue Barker's to pop the question, so there ! 
{Exit.) 

Martha {throws down sweeper^ drops into chair, and 
bursts into a flood of tears). I don't care, now ; hateful old 
thing! {Sobs violently. After a pause door opens slowly 
and ]o¥iNNiE peeps in; seeing Martha, steps inside quietly^ 
closes door, then advances on tiptoe towards her. Stops a 
moment, lookijtg at her.) 

Johnnie {faintly). Marthy. 

Martha {looking up dubiously). Well, what do you want ? 

Johnnie. Say, Marthy, do you feel very bad .? I didn't 
mean nothing, an' I wouldn't marry that old fool of a Sue 
Barker if she was the last woman on earth. I couldn't help 
walkin' up with her last night. She come right up along- 
side o' me, an' says " Good-evenin'," and I couldn't get r?d 
of her nohow. {Puts arm round her.) 

Martha {smiling through her tears). Really, Johnnie.? 
{Rises.) 

Johnnie. True's I live. Hope to die. Cross my breath. 

{Doing so.) 

Martha. Oh, Johnnie ! {Falls into his arms.) 

Johnnie. Oh, Marthy ! {Holds her tightly:) 

Martha. Say, Johnnie, it's almost worth while gitting 

mad je§' for the fun of raakin' up, ain't it ? 



12 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

Johnnie. You bet. {Sings.) "An' Johnnie placed his 
arm round his Martha's waist so sHm, and Johnnie kissed 
Martha " {kissing her behind his hat), " and Martha kissed 
him." {They both osailate fervently behind hat.) M-ra-m- 
m m-m ! 

Belle {outside r., callijtg ojf). Hurry up, Marion ! 
(Johnnie and Martha scatter. Johnnie runs out; Mar- 
tha snatches up sweeper and works it vigorously. Enter 
Belle and Marion.) 

Belle. What was that noise, Martha ? 

Martha. I jest let the dog out, ma'am, that's all. 
{Aside.) Came pretty near letting the cat out, too. 

Belle. Oh, all right. .You may go now, Martha. {Exit 
Martha, l.) 

Marion. Now keep your courage up and see me through, 
won't you, there's a dear. We can explain it all afterwards, 
and it will be such fun ! 

Belle. Oh, but Aunt Sarah will be wild ! {Sits before 
fre.) 

Marion {sits at table). Nonsense! SKe need never — 
{Noise of coming dotvn stairs, r.) Sh ! Here he comes. 
{Enter Ned, r.) 

Ned. Ah, Miss Morton, still here, I see. (6'<?^m^ Belle.) 
I beg pardon. 

Marion {7'ising). Miss Kimball, Mr. Winslow, Jack's 
chum. 

ViViA.'K {courtesying low ; then extending her hand). Mr. 
Winslow. 

Ned {taking her hand). Miss Kimball, I am most happy. 
I assure you I have looked forward to this meeting. Miss 
Morton's brother has told me so much about you, you know. 
{Aside.) And by all that's holy I don't blame him, either. 
I'm smitten myself. {Sits in easy -chair., c, Belle sitting 
L., Marion r.) 

Marion {aside). What fun! If Belle only doesn't get 
rattled. {Aloud?) Yes, and of course Miss Kimball and I 
have heard lots about you. One thing — that you were 
always getting into scrapes of one kind and another. 

Ned {confidently)^ Oh, that was years ago. I've out- 
grown that. I used to fall into all sorts of ridiculous blun- 
ders, not infrequently getting myself seriously disliked 
thereby. But that was when I was young. I never do those 
things now. 



A LION AMONG LADIES. 1 3 

Marion {meaningly), Oli ! 

Ned {aside). She looks as if she didn't beh'eve it. 

Belle. Seems to me you two became very well acquainted 
in a short time. How did you manage it ? 

Ned. Oh, very simply. You see, I had pictured in my 
mind just how Miss Morton would look, and I should hive 
reco^rnized her in Austraha had I chanced to meet her there. 
Tlien Jack always carried a cabinet photograph of her in his 
inside coat pocket on the left side. I've seen him look at it 
many a time at night when he thought I was asleep. I 
always supposed it must be his girl. Fellows are not usually 
so sentimental about their sisters. {During Ned's speech,, 
Belle and yixvaon excha7tge glances,, wink when Ned isn't 
looking, etc.) 

Marion {aside, restraining her laughter with difficulty). 
Oh, I can't stand this any longer. I must go somewhere and 
laugh. {Aloud.) If you young people will excuse me I will 
go down and see if Mr. Winslow's dinner is ready. {Crosses 
behind Ned.) He must be nearly starved. 

Ned {risijig). Well, come to think of it, I believe I am, 
though it hadn't occurred to me before. {Crosses to R. 
Aside.) That girl's got a bad eye. She has a look as if she 
were a mind-reader and found the result of her perusal very 
amusing. 

Marion {at door, l.). Well, be good children, and don't 
say harsh things about your friends. {Exit, laughing aside.) 

Ned {sits at k. of table. After a pause). Do you ever 
have presentiments, Miss Kimball.'' 

Belle. Why, I don't know ; why ? 

Ned. Oh, nothing. Only I am always having presenti- 
ments, and always being disappointed, agreeably or other- 
wise, in them. Do you know, I always have an idea that I 
shall like or dislike a person before I meet them, and — well, 
I'm almost always wrong. 

Belle. How funny ! 

Ned. Yes, isn't it .? Now, for instance, without ever hav- 
ing seen either you or Miss Morton, I had made up 
my mind that I should like her immensely, and — and — 
{confused.) 

Belle. Well, Mr. Winslow, go on. 

Ned. Well, you see, why — {Aside.) Hang it, I've a 
presentiment nowthat I'm making a fool of myself ! {Aloud.) 
Why, that {laughing), I shouldn't hke you, you know. 



14 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

Belle. Oh, yes ; and is this an exception to your rule 
concerning presentiments ? 

Ned (aside). Well, if this isn't a great mess I'm getting 
myself into. Now, I've got to tell the girl that I like her and 
don't like her friend. They probably won't speak to me to- 
morrow. {Aloud.) Well, no ; not exactly. 

Belle. Oh ! then I am to understand that you approve 
of me ? 

Ned {forgetting himself). Oh, immensely. 

Belle. Thank you. And that you don't like Miss Mor- 
ton .? 

Ned (aside). The deuce ! It's come now. How shall I 
get out of it. (Aloud.) No, not that, but not immensely, 
you know. The fact is. Miss Kimball, I have a kind of a feel- 
ing all -the time that my chum's sister is quizzing me, and 
then laughing at me behind my back. 

Belle. Oh, you misjudge her, I'm sure. Miss Morton 
is the sweetest girl in the world, I assure you. (Aside.) 
Perhaps he'll remember that when he comes out of it. 

(Noise outside back, stamping of feet., and noise of so7ne 
one coming thi^ough hall. Ente?' c, suddenly., Jack, clad 
in heavy ovei^coat, etc.) 

Belle. Jack, darling ! (Rushes to him and throws her- 
self into his arms., while Ned stands looking dazed.) 

Jack. Well, my pet (kisses her)., better late than never. 
(Looks at Ned, who stands still stai'ing.) What's the mat- 
ter, Ned ? 

N?:d {suddenly recallijig himself). Oh, nothing ! (Aside.) 
Well, that knocks me out. I didn't know they had got so 
far along as that. (Sighs.) Lucky dog ! On the whole, IVe 
changed my mind about cutting him out. 

Belle (who has been taking Jack's things as he removes 
tJiem., and putting them on chair). But how did you get up 
from Miller's Falls ? We did not expect you till after ten. 

Jack. Oh, I had a streak of luck to compensate for my 
hard luck in getting left, I suppose. I caught a ride on the 
up freight due in Greenfield at nine o'clock ; had to ride in 
the caboose all the way and sat on an old soap-box, sur- 
rounded by a heterogeneous collection of rubber boots, lunch 
pails, oil suits, and kerosene lanterns. I was half frozen and 
nearly starved besides. One of the freight hands kindly offered 
me a doughnut out of his lunch pail. It was as big round as the 
crown of my h^t and Xm tjmvs as tough. J tackled it, but it 



A LION AMONG LADIES. 15 

threw me on the third round and I gave it up. I'm <roin<y to 
write it up for the Crimson when, I get back to collecr^ — 
" Downed by a Doughnut ; or, the f^reight Hand's Revenue ! " 
How would that sound ? However. I got here just tlie — *a — 
nevertheless, and I suppose I ought to be tliankful for that. 
But where are father and aunt ? 

Belle (fie?'vous/y). Oh, they're down street shopping. 
(To both:) But do come out into the dining-room and get 
something to eat, and see — the — {looking sidezvise at Ned) 
rest of the family. ' 

Ned {aside). 'The rest of the family. Well, that means 
business, most assuredly. 

Jack. Well, I suppose I may go to my room first. PI! 
be with you in a moment. Come up, Ned.? 

Ned. Oh, cert. {Both exit, r.) 

Belle. Won't Aunt Sarah give it to me if she finds it 
out! I wonder what Marion went off for. Guess I'll ^o see 
{Exit.) ^ 

{Enter c, with considerable noise and stamping, etc., the 
Squire and^li^s Sarah, both loaded with parcels which 
they dump anywhere.) 

Sarah {throwing off" wraps). For the land's sake, Henry, 
I wonder if it's going to storm till Christmas. 

Squire Morton. I hope not, I'm sure, Sarah. I'm afraid 
now that the roads will be blocked before Monday, and that 
Jack will be delayed. It will be too bad if he is, for I want - 
the young folks to have a pleasant week, and as sure's my 
name is Henry Morton, I'm not going to spare any expense 
to make it so for 'em. Bless my soul, but v/on't we give 'em a 
jolly time, eh, Sarah ? We'll shov/ 'em that there's some fun 
to be had in- Greenfield if 'tis way up in the Berkshires. 
Ha ! ha ! ha ! {Rubbing his hands.) 

Sarah. Oh, you dear old boy, you're always thinking 
about the young people. {Sighs.) Well, I was young once 
myself But where can the girls be ? {Noise of laughter 
outside, r. Enter ]K(ZYi followed by Ned.) 

Jack. Father ! 

Squire M. What, Jack ? Why, how's this ? {They em- 
brace after the ma?iner of men.) 

Jack {turning to Sarah). And, Aunty, how are you ? 
{E?nbraces and kisses her on the cheek; turning.) Aunt, 
allow me to introduce my chum, Mr, Winslow of Boston, 



l6 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

(Sarah courtesies low ; Ned bows in his best style?) Father 
my friend, Ned Winslow, of whom I wrote you. 

Squire M. Mr. Winslow, you are welcome to my house. 
Everything it contains is at your disposal for the next week. 

Ned. Thank you, sir, most heartily. {Aside.) The old 
boy's a trump, but Jack's got a mortgage on the best prop- 
erty in the house — that's Miss Marion. 

Squire M. Ahem ! I met a Winslow at Washington 
when I was in the Senate in '69. He was senator from the 
Sixth Congressional District. 

Ned. He was my grandfather, sir. 

Squire M. Indeed ! A gentleman, every inch of him. 

Jack. Well, I had rather hard luck getting here, father. 
I'll tell you about it after we get something to eat. We are 
starving ! Aren't we, Ned t 

- {Enter Marion and Belle, l.) 

Marion {to Jack, who stands half tiirned from her'). 
Why, Jack ! 

Jack {turns and crosses quickly., and seizes both her hands j 
they come down c). This is a pleasure. I had hardly 
dared ask for you yet, fearing you might not be here. 

Ned {staring agai?i ; aside). Well, if that isn't the queer- 
est way for a man to greet his own sister that I ever saw ! By 
Jove, I'm stumped ! 

Squire M. — Well, come, let's go down and give the young 
gentlemen something to eat. Come, Sarah, we'll go down 
and see them through the crisis, ha! ha! ha! Will you 
come down, girls '^ 

Marion. No, thanks, we'll wait. {Exit l. all but 
Marion and Belle, who drop into chairs and laugh hys- 
terically.) 

curtain. 



A LION AMONG LADIES. 1/ 



ACT II. 

Scene. — The same. 

The Squire, Jack, and Ned discovered s7noking ci(^ars. 
The Squire, in dressing-goivn, in chair at table, spectacles 
on, reading newspaper. Ned in large chair at fir e.^ Jack in 
chair L. As curtain rises S quire lets paper fall into his lap, 
pushes spectacles up on to his forehead, blows a cloud of 
smoke, watches it curl upward, looks at cigar, then — 

Squire M. Pretty good weed that, Jack, my boy ; a trifle 
dry, that's all. {Pnfi, puff.) After all what is there like a 
good cigar after dinner ? It's the prayer after the sermon, 
the farce after the tragedy. The sunrise after the night ; or 
the morning snooze after a good night's rest. There's noth- 
ing like it, boys ; nothing. I pity the man who doesn't smoke. 

Ned. Are yon a connoisseur in tobacco, Squire Morton .? 

Squire M. I was once, my boy. I used to pride myself 
on my cigars. When I was in the Senate in '69, they used 
to call me '" Old Havana-filled." 

Jack. And yet a few years after that you gave me about 
the only licking I ever had in my life when you caught me 
smoking sweet-fern cigarettes out behind the barn one Sun- 
day morning. 

Squire M. Yes, and you deserved it, too, PJl warrant, 
though I've forgotten all about it. But do you know. Jack, your 
dear Aunt Sarah is just as much of a crank on the subject of 
tobacco smoke now as ever. You remember how she used 
to kick about my smoking ? 

Jack. Don't I, though! But it never made much differ- 
ence to you, that I could see. I remember that morning you 
licked me for smoking, she laughed at me when you were 
taking me up stairs. That was the hardest part of it. Ugh ! 
*' Her bright smile haunts me still ! " 

Squire: M. {laughing). Well, well my boy, she meant 
well, and does now, but the women can't understand these 
things. They can't be expected to, bless their dear souls ! - 

Ned. Anien ! 

Squire M. To what, Winslow? 



1 8 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

Ned. "Bless their dear souls." 

Jack. That's good, from a confirmed old bachelor. 

Ned. That's just the point, Jack. I like 'em all. I 
admire woman in the abstract; mere femininity exerts such 
a power over me that I've never yet been able to disassociate 
any particular specimen of the genus from the order as a 
whole long enough to concentrate my attention upon her and 
realize the value of her specific merits. 

Squire M. Young man, you're in a bad way ! 

Ned. I know it, squire, but what can a fellow do ? 

Squire M. Well, quit smoking, and drink lots of milk. 

Ned. Why, just now you were singing the praises of the 
weed. Now you're on another tack. 

Squire M. Oh, I meant for men. 

Ned (blankly). Oh ! 

Squire M. {chuckling^ aside). One on Winslow. 

{Enter Sarah.) 

Sarah. Tobacco smoke And the young ladies coming 
down again in five minutes ! Go along up into the smoking- 
room every one of you ! What do you think we have a smok- 
ing-room for ? Come, hurry up ! {Bi/ sties I'ottnd, opens door 
into hall and also door 'K. Men exeii?tt, Ia7ighi7ig, k.) Oh, 
these men ! these men ! {Ring outside.) Oh, that must be 
Jack's trunk. {Goes to door L., calling off) Martha ! 
{Pause ; loiider.) Martha ! 

y\.KW\:vi.K {outside). Yes, ma'am, I'm a-comin'. {Enters.) 

Sarah. Answer the doorbell, Martha. It's probably the 
man with the trunk. Tell him to take it right upstairs. 
{Exit L.) 

Martha. Oh, I'll bet it's Johnnie. {Runs out c. After 
a mo?ne?it re-enters followed by John, carrying tru7ik on left 
shoulder. Co?nes down r. c. ; Martha, l. c.) 

Johnnie. I brought this 'ere trunk up on purpose to see you 
again, Marthy. Jest skip out in the hall, an' when I come 
down we'll go on from where them girls interrupted us before. 

Martha {giggles). All right, Johnnie. Hurry up. {Goes 
toward door to open it for hi7nj as he reaches door., the 
trunk concealing his head.) 

Johnnie. Give us jes' one now, Marthy, before I go up. 
Something might happen before I come down again, you 
know — an earthquake or something. {Puts right arJ7i round 
her 7ieck. ) 



A LION AMONG LADIES. IQ 

Martha. Oh, go 'long, silly! {They osculate loudly be- 
hi7tdtrji7ik, once, twice, tJirice. Etiter Sarah l. Sees thejii, 
screams, commences to faint, then changes her mind and gets 
Iliad.) 

Sarah. Young man, there's the door. {Points c.) 

Johnnie {sta7'ti?tgfor it with trunk). Oh, do you want 
it left out there ? 

Sarah. No ! no ! no ! up there ! {Pointing r. ; Johnnie 
goes out R. ; Sarah — laughi7tg, aside, in spite of her efort 
to appear dignified — to MARTHA, who has been sta7idi7ig 
sheepishly all the time, swinging 07i her heel.) Martha, you 
may return to the kitchen. {Aside, goi7ig.) Well, I was young 
once myself. {Exit l.) 

(Martha crosses to door l., is about going out, turns 
whett Johnnie reappears aJ door r.) 

Martha. Now you see what you've done. 

Johnnie. 'Twan't me ; 'twas you. 

Martha. Where was you all the time ? 

Johnnie. Humph ! Well, I wa'n't far off, was, I, Marthy ? 
Gimme jest one more, and then I'll go ; but I'll see you after 
meetin' to-morrow night. {They are about to kiss agai7t 
when Sara^h calls oiitside : " Martha ! ") 

Martha {turning suddenly and fleeing out door r). Yes, 
ma'am ! {Leavi7ig John sta7idi7ig in position as if about to 
kiss.) 

Johnnie {turni7ig toivard audience). There's many a 
slip 'twixt the cup and the lip. Well. {Going off c, shaking 
his head dubiously .^ They're slippery critters, these women. 

{Enter Belle and Marion l., arms about each other.') 

Marion. Well, I never saw any one look so scared in my 
life as you did when those fellows were eating their supper. 
Why, I thought you were going to faint once. {Sits i7t easy- 
chair.) 

Belle. Well, I did come awfully near it. But say, how 
are you going to get out of this.'' {Goes to window a7id 
looks out.) 

Marion. Well, the same way we got in, I guess — fall 
out. But I hadn't thought much about it yet. 

Belle. Did you see him staring at us while they were eat- 
ing their supper.^ {Crosses l., and sits on rug at Marion's 
feet. Stares i?ito fire absently.) 



20 A LION AMONG LADIES, 

Marion. Who's him ? There are several " hims" in the 
house now, you know. 

Belle. Why, Mr. Winslow, of course. He looked as if 
he would like to eat you that time he looked up and caught 
you laughing at him when he was eating his pie. 

Marion. Imagine a Boston blue-blood eating pie! 
Shades of the departed Winslows, Mayflower and West 
India, protest ! 

Belle. Well, I'm sure Aunt Sarah's mince pies are good 
enough for any one. But. joking aside, Marion, what will he 
think of us when he finds it out ? 

Marion. He — who ? 

Belle. Why, Mr. Winslow, of course. 

Marion. Well, what do you care what he thinks? 

Belle. Why, of course I care. We may forfeit his re- 
spect entirely. 

Marion. Oh ! (Aside.) It's evident that the B. B. B. 
has made an impression. Well, it won't do to let him know 
it. 

Belle. Don't you see that you've got us into an awfully 
awkward position by your recklessness ? 'Twas great fun at 
first, but it's getting serious. 

Marion («j?V/<?). Decidedly! 

Belle. Of course Mr. Winslow is too much of a gentle- 
man to show that he is hurt by our actions, but we will cer- 
tainly sink in his estimation when he knows the whole truth. 

Marion. Seems to me you're awfully anxious to shine 
before the blue-blood. I never knew you to worry about any 
man's opinion before. {Rises and crosses to r.) 

Belle. Why, Marion, you know better. What has come 
over you .? (Pj-epares to weep.) 

Marion {7'etiirni7ig to her qiiickly and putting af7n about 
her). Why, you dear child, of course you know I didn't 
mean anything. Haven't you got used to me yet .'* There, 
dearest, weep no more. I'll make a clean confession to the 
dear boy at the first opportunity. {Aside.) It's a bad case, 
and so sudden ! 

Belle. Of course it is silly of me. Marion, but you know 
I haven't the sang-froid ih^ii you have in these matters. 

Marion {aside). Evidently not. {Alond.) Well, dear, 
I'm going to prepare aunty so that we can avoid a scene if 
anything should happen. {Exit L.) 

Belle {crosses to easy-chair., turjts it facing fire., sinks 



A LION AMONG LADIES, 21 

into it, and sits gazing at the fire). What a fool I am ! 
Why, the man hasn't been in the house but two hours. But 
when he looked up at me after he saw Marion laughing at 
him, there was such a reproachful look on his face that I^ust 
pitied him from the bottom of my heart. Poor fellow ! He's 
so homely that he's positively handsome! {Gazes into fire, 
back tzirned from R.) 

{Enter Ned, r., chewing a new cigar not lit ; not seeing 
• Belle.) 

Ned {aside). Jack and his dear old dad are reminiscing 
for all they're worth. A model father and a model son ! 
Told 'em I'd be back in a minute. {Crosses and leans on 
table.) By Jove, I had to get off somewhere and collect my 
scattered senses a little. This is great business for me to 
come up here with Jack, and go and get smitten on his girl 
at first sight. Oh, but the way she looked at me when I was 
eating that pie ! She seemed to be sort of pitying me, and 
she looked awfully embarrassed, too, every time I caught her 
eye. {Suddenly.) Well, it's no use, Winslow% this won't 
do ! You'll have to get out of here Monday morning. Make 
some sort of an excuse, rheumatism, or something.' I'll for- 
get her soon enough when I get back to Boston — that is, 
I'll try to. (Belle coughs slightly and Ned starts and looks 
over toward her.) By Jove! There she is now! What a 
picture! It seems a pity to disturb it. {Aloud, crossing to 
L.) Ah — I beg pardon, Miss Kimball. (Belle starts at 
sound of his voice.) Been sitting here some time thinking ; 
didn't notice you till I heard you cough. 

Belle. ■ A penny for your thoughts, Mr. Winslow. The 
subject must have been an important one, for you've let your 
cigar go out. 

Ned. Why, no ! The fact is it's a new one, and I forgot 
to light it at all. 

Belle. Oh, let me light it for you. I often light pnpa's. 
{Goes to mantel for a snatch.) 

Ned {aside). Ye gods ! But Jack is a lucky dog ! 
{Aloud.) But don't you object to the smoke, Miss Kim- 
ball? 

Belle. Oh, no ! I rather like the odor of a good cigar^ 
{Strikes match.) 

Ned {aside). Thank Heaven they're fifteen-centers ! 



22 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

(Belle comes down with liojited match, and Ned stands at 
left of table while she holds it and lights his cigar, then 
t7irjis and tht'ows 7natch into the fi^eplace.^ 

Ned {aside). By Jove, I can't stand this ! It's criminal 
for me to stay here. 

Belle. Smoke as much as you hke, Mr. Winslow, as long 
as Aunt Sarah doesiiH catch you. We girls like it. {Sits l.) 

Ned {sits r.). That is, you like the odor of the smoke 
and like to watch a man smoking. {Aside) That is. Jack. 
{Aloud.) But do you approve of it as a habit? 

Belle. Well, no ! not altogether. Still, if it's any com- 
fort to a fellow, why, I see no harm in it. 

Ned. My views exactly, Miss Kimball. {Aside.) Jack 
is 2l lucky dog, and no mistake. 

Belle {aside). Miss Kimball! Oh, I do wish we hadn't 
done it. I've a great mind to tell him myself, but no : Marion 
got us into it, now she'll have to get us out. 

Sarah {outside l., calling off). All right, Marion, I'll 
remember. 

^ Belle {quickly). Oh, here comes Aunt Sarah. Put that 
cigar out of sight quick. 

{Both blow smoke away and fan with their hands to clear 
the air. Ned runs out r. Belle stands at table. Enter 
Sarah.) 

Sarah {sniffing the air). Have the men been in here 
smoking again.? I suppose those boys will completely de- 
moralize Henry within the next week ! And just as I've got 
him thoroughly trained, too! Oh, these men I these men! 

Belle {mournfully). I agree with you, aunty. 

Sarah {sharply). What do you know about them — a chit 
of a girl like you ? A pretty mess you and that scatter- 
brained girl have got yourselves into, haven't you ? {Soften- 
ing^ Well, well, boys will be boys, and girls will be girls, I 
s'pose, to the end of time. {Aside.) And I was young once 
myself 

Belle. Well, aunty, you know we didn't think when we 
commenced, but of course we're awfully sorry, and Marion's 
going to explain it all to him at the first opportunity. 

Sarah. Easy enough to explain, but there's no knowing 
what he'll think of you. {Aside.) He isn't worth worrying 
about if he thinks any the less of them for it. {Aloud.) But 



A LION AMONG LADIES. 23 

come, dear, and see the Christmas present your papa and I 
bought for Jack. {Exit both l. Enter Marion/t^w hall.) 

Marion {shivering). Bo'oh! It's snowing harder than 
ever. I don't beheve we'll get out of the house before Mon- 
day at the earliest. {Takes large chair at fireplace.) 
There's one thing I Hke about this household, in contra- 
distinction to most country households. They're never in any 
hurry about going to bed. Here it is, nearly eleven o'clock, 
and the men are all up in the smoking-room over their cigars ; 
Belle and Aunt Sarah are looking over Christmas presents ; 
and I — well, I'm wondering where Jack is keeping himself 
all this time. I never knew him to stay away from me so 
long when he had a chance to see me. {Takes up book from 
table and reads > Enter Jack, r.) 

]K<ZYi {sees her. Co?nesdownK. Aside). Now or never! 
I've been trying for eighteen months to make up my mind to 
it, but somehow I couldn't do it. I've thought sometimes of 
getting Winslow to help me out, but I'm afraid 'twould be 
another Priscilla and John Alden racket. {Crosses to 
Marion; leaning over her chair. Aloud.) What are you 
reading, Marion 1 

Marion {starts slightly). Howells, as usual. " A 
Chance Acquaintance" this time. And I've read over about 
a hundred and fifty pages waiting for the fellow to propose. 
I've about given up all hope that he'll ever do it. {Aside.) 
That ought to fetch him if anything will. 

Jack {aside). My case exactly! {Aloud.) Well, you 
know it's not always so easy as one might at first suppose. 
A fellow's not always sure of his ground, you know. 

Marion. Some men want to be sure of the earth ! — Ah, 
that is, according to Howells. 

Jack {aside). By Jove, that sounds pointed. {Aloud.) 
But, confound it, a fellow who's never been there naturally 
feels a little awkward when the crisis comes. 

Marion. But when a girl's just dying for him to speak and 
all ready to fly into his arms — ah — as this girl in the book 
is. {Aside.) Oh, I really believe he's going to. {Rises, 
droppijtg book i)i chair.) 

Jack. Oh, dash the book ! I beg pardon ; but if the 
girl wouldn't always look so blamed pretty just as the fellow's 
going to speak, it wouldn't be so hard ! 

Marion {facing audience ; aside). Oh, he is I he is ! 

Jack {starting forward as she iurns toward him). 
Marion I {Opens his arms.) 



24 A LION AMONG LADIES. 

Marion. Jack ! {Falls into his ar^ns, turning up he?- 
face. He kisses her on the lips. Enter r., Ned.) 

Ned {aside). Well, my eccentric chum has concluded 
to embrace his sister at last. {Crosses behind thein to i..) 
Ahem! Beg pardon ! {Both start suddenly.) 

Jack. Oh, it's only Ned. {To Ned.) I've done it, old 
man ! Congratulate me. 

Ned {staring puzzled.) Eh ? 

{Enter Belle l.) 

Belle. At last ! Oh, Marion ! {Kisses her, then kisses 
Jack, at which Ned looks 7nournful.) 

Ned {aside). Well, I'll be hanged if I can see through 
this circus ! Has the man been accepted by his own sister.? 

{Etiter R., Squire M. ; l., Aunt Sarah. Both grasp 

sitiiation.) 

Squire M. Well, the expected has happened, eh .? 
{Rubbing his hands j goes to Marion, ^/<?^(?x a hand on each 
cheek., and kisses her on the ?f70uth. Fats Jack approvi7igly 
on the shotilder., and crosses to C.) 

Sarah {co7ning dowit). Great times at our house. 
{Aside.) Well, I was young once, myself. 

Ned. But, I say, won't somebody explain the thing.? I'm 
rattled. 

Marion. Yes, Mr. Winslow, I'll try to. It's all my 
doing. I deceived you just for fun, and made you think I 
was Jack's sister. But I'm not ; am I, Jack .? {Looks up at 
him archly.) 

Jack {p7itting arm about her). Well, not exactly, 

Ned. Eh? What? (T^ Belle.) And you ? Thank 
God! 

Belle. Why, Mr. Winslow? 

Ned. Oh, nothing! I'll tell you to-morrow. {Their 
looks express it.) 

Sarah {taking centre l.) Oh, these men ! These men ! 

Squire. Sarah. 
Jack. Marion. Belle. Ned, 

curtain. 



THE UNIVERSAL STAGE, 



ALWAYS INTENDED. A Comedy in 1 

Act. By Horace Wi^an. 3 male, 3 female char. 

THE ANONYMOUS KISS. A Vaudeville. 

- malB. 2 female char. 

ANOTHER GLASS. A Drama in 1 Act. 

Bv Tliomas Moiton. 6 male, 3 female char. 

AUNT CHARLOTTE'S MAID. A Farce 

in 1 Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 

THE BABES IN THE WOOD. A Comedy 

in 3 Acts. Bv Tom Taylor. 10 male, 3 female char. 

BLANKS AND PRIZES. A Comedietta 

in 1 Act. By Dexter Smith. 6 male, 2 female char. 

BLUE AND CHERRY. A Comedy in 1 

Act. 3 male, 2 female char. 

BOUQUET, A Comedietta in 1 Act. By 

J. A. Woodward. 2 male, 2 female char. 

BOWLED OUT. A Farce in 1 Act. By 

H. T. Craven. 4 male, 8 female char. 

BROTHER BILL AND ME. A Farce in 

1 Act. By W. E. Suter. 4 male, 3 female char. 

A BULL IN A CHINA SHOP. A Comedy 

in 2 Acts. By Charles Matthews. 6 male, 4 female 

THE CHRISTENING. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By J. B. Buckstone. 5 male, 6 female char. 

THE CLEFT STICK. A Comedy in 3 Acts. 

6 male, 3 female char. 

COUSIN TOM. A Comedietta in 1 Act. 

By Geo. Roberts. 3 male. 2 female char. 

DAMON AND PYTHIAS. A Farce. 6 

male, 4 female char. 

DANDELION'S DODGES. A Farce in 1 

Act. By T. .T. Williams. 4 male, 2 female char. 

THE DAUGHTER OF THE REGIMENT. 

A Drama in 2 Aots. By Edward Fitzball. 6 male, 

2 female char. 

DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND. An Interlude 

in 1 Act. Bv W. H. Murray. 10 male, 1 female. 

DONE ON BOTH SIDES. A Farce in 1 

Act. B3' J. M. Morton. 3 male, 2 female char. 

DON'T JUDGE BY APPEARANCES. A 

Farce in 1 Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 2 female. 

DORA. A Pastoral Drama in 3 Acts. By 

Chas. Reade. 5 rnale, 2 female char. 

A DOUBTFUL VICTORY. A Comedy in 

1 Act. 3 male. 2 female char. 

DUNDUCKETTY'S PICNIC. A Farce in 1 

Act. By r. J. Williams. 6 male, 3 female char. 

EAST LYNNE. A Drama in 5 Acts. 8 

.. male. 7 female char- 

GASPARDO THE GONDOLIER. A Drama 

A 3 Acts. Bv George A I mar. 10 male, 2 female. 

GIVE A DOG A BAD NAME. A Farce. 

2 male, 2 female char. 

THE HIDDEN HAND. A Drama in 5 Acts. 

Bv Robert Jones. 16 male, 7 female char. 

HIT HIM, HE HAS NO FRIENDS. A 

Farce in 1 Act. By E. VTates and N. H. Harrington. 

7 male, 3 female char. 

A HUSBAND TO ORDER. A Serio-comic 

Drama in 2 Acts. 5 male, 3 female char. 

I'VE WRITTEN TO BROWNE. A Farce 

in I Act. B V T. J. Willi.tms. 4 male, 3 female char. 

JOHN DOBBS. A Farce in 1 Act. By 

J. M. Morton. 5 male, 2 female char. 

JOHN W0PP3. A Faroe in 1 Act. By 

W. E. Suter. 4 male, 2 female char. 

THE LOST CHILDREN. A Musical En- 
tertainment in 5 Acts. By Mrs. Lewis Jervey. 8 

male, 5 female char., and chorus. 

LOOK AFTER BROWN. A Farce in 1 Act, 

By Geor(?o A. Stuart, M.D. 6 male, 1 femaU char. 

LOST IN LONDON. A Drama in 3 Acts. 

6 male, 4 female char. 



LYING WILL OUT. A Comedy in 4 Acts. 

By H. Pelhara Curtis. 6 male, 4 female char. 

MADAM IS ABED. A Vaudeville in 1 Act. 

2 male, 2 female char. 

MARY MOO ; or, Which Shall I Marry? 

A Farce in 1 Act. By W. E. Suter. 2 male, 1 fem. 

MONSEIGNEUR. A Drama in 8 Acts. By 

Thomas Archer. 15 male, 3 female char. 

MY PRECIOUS BETSY. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By J. M. Morton. 4 male, 4 female char. 

MY TURN NEXT. A Farce in 1 Act. By 

T. J. Williams. 4 male, 3 female char. 

NICHOLAS FLAM. A Comedy in 2 Acts. 

By J. B. Buckstone. 5 male, 3 female char. 

NONE SO DEAF AS THOSE WHO WON'T 

Hear. A Comedietta in 1 Act. By H. P. Curtis. 2 
male, 2 female char. 

NURSEY CHICKWEED. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By T. J. Williams. 4 male, 2 female char. 

OLD HONESTY. A Comic Drama in 2 

Acts. By J. M. Morton. 5 male, 2 female char. 

ONLY A CLOD. A Comic Drama in 1 Act. 

By J. P. Simpson. 4 male, 1 female char. 

PAYABLE ON DEMAND. A Domestic 

Drama in 2 Acts. 7 male, 1 female char. 

THE PHANTOM BREAKFAST. A Farce 

in 1 Act. By Chas. Selby. 3 male, 2 female char, 

I'UTKINS; Heir to Castles in the Air. 

A Comic Drama in 1 Act. By W. R. Emerson, 2 
male, 2 female char. 

THE QUEEN'S HEART. A Comedy in 3 

Acts. 5 male, 4 female char. 

A RACE FOR A WIDOW. A Farce in 1 

Act. By T. J. Williams. 5 male, 4 female char. 

SARAH'S YOUNG MAN. A Farce in J 

Act. By W. E. Suter. 3 male, 3 female char. 

THE SCARLET LETTER. A Drama in 3 

Acts. 8 male, 7 female char. 

SILVERSTONE'S WAGER. A Comedi- 

etta in 1 Act. By R. R. Andrews. 4 male, 3 female. 

A SLICE OF LUCK. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By J. M. Morton. 4 male, 2 female char. 

SMASHINGTON GOIT. A Farce in l Act. 

By T. J. Williams. 5 male, 3 female char. 

A SOLDIER, A SAILOR, A TINKER, 

and a Tailor. A Farce in 1 Act. 4 male, 2 female. 

SUNSHINE THROUGH THE CLOUDS. 

A Drama in 1 Act. By Slingsby Lawrence. 3 male, 

TRUE i/nTO death. A Drama in 2 Acts. 

By J. Sheridan Knowles. 6 male, 2 female char. 

THE TURKISH BATH. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By Montague Williams and F. C. Bumand. 6 male, 
1 female char. 

TWO GENTLEMEN IN A FIX. A Farce 

in 1 Act. By W. E. Suter. 2 male char. 

TWO HEADS BETTER THAN ONE. A 

Farce in 1 Act. Bv Lenox Home. 4 male, 1 female. 

THE TWO PUDDIFOOTS. A Farce in 1 

Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 3 female char. 

AN UGLY CUSTOMER. A Farce in 1 Act. 

By Thomas J. Williams. 3 male, 2 female char. 

UBTCLE ROBERT. A Comedy in 3 Acts. 

By H. P. Curtis. 6 male, 2 female char. 

A VERY PLEASANT EVENING. A Farce 

in 1 Act. Bv W. E. Suter. 3 male char. 

THE WELSH GIRL. A Comedy in 1 Act. 

Bv Mrs. Planche. 3 male, 2 female char. 

WHICH WILL HAVE HIM? A Vaude 

ville. 1 male, 2 fenmle char. 

THE WIFE'S SECRET. A Play in 5 Acts. 

By Geo. W. Lovell. 10 male, 2 female char. 

YOUR LIFE'S IN DANGER, A Farce in 

1 Act. By J. M. Morton. 3 male, 8 female char- 



WALTER H. BAEEE & CO., Publishers, Boston, Mass. 

p. O. Box 2846. 



GEORGE M. BAKEF 

Price 15 cents, unless other 



ABOVE THE CLOUDS. Drama in two 

acts. 7 males, 4 females. 
AMONG THE BBEAKEBS. Drama in 

two acts. 6 males, 4 females. 
BETTEB THAN QOLB. Drama in four 

acts. 5 males, 4 females. 25 CentS. 

BON-BONS. Musical entertainment. 3 males, 

I female. 25 CentS. 

BOSTON DIP, THE. Comedietta in one 

act. 4 males, 3 females. 

BREAD ON THE WATERS. Drama in 

two acts, s males, 3 females. 
CAFULETTA. Burlesque in two parts. 3 

males, i female. 

CHAMPION OF HER SEX, THE. Farce 

in one act. 8 females. 

CHRISTMAS CAROL, A. Christmas en- 
tertainment from Dickens. Many char. 

CLOSE SHAVE, A. Farce in one act. 6 

I11316S 

COALS OF FIRE. Farce in one act. 6 

COMRADES. Drama in three acts. 4 males, 

3 females. 25 CentS. 
DOWN BY THE SEA. Drama in two 

acts. 6 males, 3 females. 
DROP TOO MUCH, A. Farce in one act. 

4 males, 2 females. 

DUCHESS OF DUBLIN. THE. Farce in 

one act. 6 males, 4 females. 
ENLISTED FOR THE WAR. Drama in 

three acts. 7 males, 3 females. 

FAIRY OF THE FOUNTAIN, THE. 

Play for children in two acts. 10 char. 26C. 

FLOWER OF THE FAMILY, THE. 

Comedy-drama in three acts. 5 males. 3 fem. 
FLOWING BOWL, THE. Drama in three 

acts. 7 males,3 females. 25 COUtS. 

FREEDOM OF THE PRESS. Farce in 

one act. 8 males. 
GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. Farce 

in one act. 12 males^ 
GREAT ELIXIR, THE. Farce in one act, 

g males. 

GREATEST PLAGUE IN LIFE, THE. 

Farce in one act. 8 females. 
GRECIAN BEND, THE. Farce in one 

act. 7 females. 

HUMORS OF THE STRIKE, TEE. 

Farce in one act. 8 males. 
HYPOCHONDRIAC, THE. Farce in one 

act. 5 males. 

LAST LOAF, THE. Drama in two acts. 

5 males, 3 females. 

LIGHTHEART'S PILGRIMAGE. Alle- 

gory for schools. 8 females and chorus. 
LITTLE BROWN JUG, THE. Drama in 

three acts. 5 males, 3 females. 
LITTLE MORE CiDER, A. Farce in one 

act. 5 males, 3 females. 
LOVE OF A BONNET, A. Farce in one 

act. 5 females. 

MAN WITH THE DEMIJOHN, THE. 

Farce in one act. 4 males. 
MY BROTHER'S KEEPER. Drama in 

three acts. 5 males, 3 females. 

MYSTERIOUS DISAPPEARANCE, A. 

Farce in one act. 4 males. 

MY UNCLE THE CAPTAIN. Farce In 

one act. 6 males. 
NEVER SAY DIE. Farce in one act. 3 

males, 3 females. 
NEVADA. Drama in three acts. 8 males, 3 

fmales. 25 oentfl. 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 



786 





NEW BR 

Farce in 

"SSP: 017 400 

ONCE 0N^^TIME7~Drama ia tw« acta. 

4 nialeSj2 females. 

ONE HUNDRED YEARS AGO. Drama 

in two acts. 8 males, 3 females. 
ORIGINAL IDEA, AN. Dialogue for a 

lady and gentleman. 
OUR FOLKS. Drama ti> three acts. 6 males, 

5 females. 

PADDLE YOUR OWN CANOE. Farce 

in one act. 7 males, 3 female^ 
PAST REDEMPTION. Djama in four 
acts. 9 males, 4 females. 25 COUtS. 

PEDLAR OF VERYNICE, THE. Bur. 

lesque. 7 males. 
PRECIOUS PICKLE, A, Farce in one 

act. 6 females. 
PUBLIC BENEFACTOB, A. Farce in 

one act. 6 males. 
REBECCA'S TRIUMPH. Drama in three 

acts. 16 females. 25 C6IitS. 

RED CHIGNON, THE. Farce in one acu 

6 females. . 

REVOLT OF THE BEES, THE.*Mu. 

sical allegory, ofemales. 
RUNAWAYS, THE. Farce in one act. 4 

males. 

SANTA CLAUS' FROLICS. Christmas. 

tree entertainment. Many char. 

SCULPTOR'S TRIUMPH, THE. AUc 

Jory. I male, 4 females. 
A OF TROUBLES, A. Farce in one 
act. 8 males. 
SEEING THE ELEPHANT. Temper- 

ance farce, s males, 2 females. 
SEVEN AGES, THE. Tableau entertain- 
ment. 7 males, 4 females. 

SHALL OUR MOTHERS VOTE! Hu- 

morous debate for 11 boys. 
SNOW BOUND. Musical and dramatic en- 
tertainment. 3 males, x fomale. 25 COHtS. 
STAND BY THE FLAG. Drama in one 

£ict K mslcs 
SILVIA'S SOLDIER. Drama in two acts. 

3 males, 2 females. 
TEMPTER, THE. Drama in one act. j 

males, i female. 
TENDER ATTACHMENT, A. Farce v 

one act. 7 males. 

THIEF OF TIME, THE. Farce in one 

act. 6 males. 

THIRTY MINUTES FOR REFRESH- 

mentS. Farce in one act 4 males, 3 fem. 

THORN AMONG THE ROSES, A. Com. 

edy in one act. 2 males, 8 females. 
TITANIA. Flay for children in two acts. 

Many char. 25 eentS. 

TOO LATE FOR THE TRAIN. Dialogue 

for 2 males, introducing songs and recitations. 

TOURNAMENT OF IDYLWENT, THE. 

Allegory for 13 females. 
VISIONS OF FREEDOM. Allegory for 

16 females. 
USING THE WEED. Farce m one act. 

Wanted, a male cook. Farce io 

one act. 4 males. , ^ 

WAR OF TFR ROSES. Allegory for 8 
females. _ „ # 

WE'RE ALL TEETOTALERS. FaK» to 

one scene. 4 males, 2 females. 



WALTER H. BAKER, & CO.Hp.o. Box 2846), Boston, Mass. 



». 4. rAXKHtt.1. 4 ••., PIHNTH», 3^23 FKANKLIN ST., I««T«N. 



